'Casey at the Library': A loose adaptation of 'Casey at the Bat'

The outlook wasn't brilliant for the studying man that day,

The library was full of losers, who had just computer games to play.

And then when the "Silent Zone" filled up, and the private rooms did the same,

A feeling of anger and resentment made it hard for Casey to stay tame.

A straggling few got up to go in deep despair; The rest-

Clung to the hope that spring's eternal in the naive college student's breast.

They thought, "if only Casey could legally get a hold of these brats-

He'd use tear gas and fisticuffs to shut their annoying traps."

But cultural norms prevented Casey, as did also silly laws,

The former, a joke, the latter a forestall to broken jaws.

So upon the quiet and afflicted student body, grim melancholy sat;

For there seemed little chance of Casey laying one out on the mat.

 But then the librarian let loose a yell to the wonderment of all,

And Ted, the security guard walked his way down the hall.

When the dust had lifted, and students saw what had occurred,

 Three pricks had been thrown out from the loud and noisy herd.

Then from 90 or so obnoxious students, there rose an angry mood,

They were here to talk and laugh, but mostly to be rude.

So they protested the actions of the honorable library staff,

This led to an increase in noise; at least by one and a half.

This was Casey's best and only chance, chaos had ensued,

It was likely no one would notice, if some loud-mouths left battered and bruised.

So he finally gave up on his studies and closed up all of his books,

He started doing calisthenics and giving dirty looks.

He wanted the dude with the loud iPod and speakers before he took on the rest,

That friggin' dude that had been beatboxing audibly to Ludacris and Kanye West.

He got up, set his sites and slowly started walking that way, 

His studying had been ruined, but this would make Casey's day.

Casey got to the table and grabbed the fella's music system,

He said, "no talky talky, homeboy; just sit there and listen."

The dude didn't know what to do as his jam box got turned off,

He did as Casey said, not letting out a peep or a cough.

As this dude's lecture was about to end,

A swarm of pesky students out of nowhere, came in

Casey was just about to finish his just and worthy job,

But the unthinkable was happening; a daggum flash mob. 

Un-rattled, Casey tried to finish what he had started,

There was no way, even in his haste he would be out-smarted.

With fire in his eyes, he raised the I-pod and speakers above his head,

After one more motion, this stinking noise machine would be dead...

Oh, somewhere in this favored land, obnoxious students get their due,

They're punished, expelled, written up, or given a beating to.

And somewhere men like Casey can put rude people in their place,

But not in that library, not on that day and not in that particular space.

When Casey had raised the speakers above his tiny head,

An officer of the law spotted him from his lazy stead.

"That one's part of the flash mob!" the officer did shout.

And before the deed was done, little Casey got thrown out.